my parents -- Doc and Anita Havens - circa 1935
A few years ago, I had a shift in thought toward my parents. They were beautiful, kind, generous people; this I've always acknowledged and appreciated. But those memories seemed to be dimmed by the stronger remembrances of their latter days. I had feelings of anger and betrayal, and guilt concerning my part in it all. I've realized that many things they did came from their love, although their actions were influenced by strong opinions about the way things should be. My regrets come from actions based in selfishness and fear. In acknowledging these memories (which may not be at all the way they actually occurred, as that’s how our ego remembers!) I feel as though they are falling out of me and I’m sweeping them away into the ethers. With every release of well-rehearsed past events, or the quiet recognition of rarely-remembered guilt and pain, peace becomes reality for me. It doesn't matter if anyone was right or wrong, it doesn't make any difference what motives were involved, part of me has been emptied to be filled with the only reality: Love.
“We cannot fill vessels already full. They must first be emptied. Let us disrobe error. Then, when the winds of God blow, we shall not hug our tatters close about us.” Mary Baker Eddy - Science & Health Page 201:13-15
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