Triggering Each Other's Wounds

photo credit: Aaron Springston

Relationships are assignments made with the purpose of triggering each other’s wounds. These wounds are mainly from childhood, and we’ve probably been replaying a version of them all our lives. In order to have maximum growth, we must face them and heal them, which cannot be done unless they’re opened up and brought to the surface. And so we meet someone, fall in love, have a mountaintop experience, then trip and fall down the hill. From that point, we can work on climbing back up, or stay where we’ve landed. In the exhilaration of romance, we have seen the truth of each other’s innocence; after a while, we get to see each other’s messed-up-ness. We may look at it in a sacred context and recognize the spiritual meaning and purpose, or we can focus on the hurt and allow our egos to separate us. Whether we live together in bodies, or live separately but remain together in heart, it makes no difference, as relationships are of the mind. I keep reminding myself that all crises are an invitation to rise to the occasion. It’s quite a trip, don’t you think?

"The holy relationship, a major step toward the perception of the real world, is learned.  It is the old, unholy relationship, transformed and seen anew.  The holy relationship is a phenomenal teaching accomplishment. In all its aspects, as it begins, develops and becomes accomplished, it represents the reversal of the unholy relationship.  Be comforted in this; the only difficult phase is the beginning.  For here, the goal of the relationship is abruptly shifted to the exact opposite of what it was.  This is the first result of offering the relationship to the Holy Spirit, to use for His purposes." A Course in Miracles